No! White Privilege Will Not Start A War!

That’s not how this works. That’s not how any of this works!

“Otto’s fate deepens my Administration’s determination to prevent such tragedies from befalling innocent people at the hands of regimes that do not respect the rule of law or basic human decency,” he added.” -Donald Trump via New York Post

My heart goes out to Otto Warmbier and his family. And it is unfortunate what happened to him and unfair considering the minor crime he committed. But this has to be said… ‘Befalling innocent people?!’ No sir, he was not innocent. His whiteness does not make him innocent. He went to a country he had no business going to. And he stole while he was there. That does not denote innocence.

It was North Korea, for god’s sake! Not the United States of White Privilege. You don’t go to a country like that and even take a piss wrong. Especially if you’re a foreigner from a rival country.

Warmbier is a sad, but prime example of white privilege that does not extend to non-white countries. Dear White people, when you go to Asian, African (predominately black), and/or South American countries, you will not get the same benefits that you get here in the States or European countries. Just like the kid in Singapore back in the 90s who was caned for vandalism.

Let this sink in…Your whiteness will not protect you there like it does here.

Yet, I heard that some in the GOP were calling for action against North Korea. Oh hell no!!! We should not have to go to war because some kid forgot he wasn’t in America and committed a crime. He should not have lost his life, but this is why you don’t commit crimes in countries you know nothing about. But I’ll tell you this, most people know (especially those with enough money to travel abroad) not to go to a country like N.Korea and fuck around like you’re in small town USA and get a pat on the back and a verbal warning by the local sheriff (if you’re white). And guess what? There have been plenty of inmates right here in ‘Murica that have died at the hands of guards and not a single thing happened to the guards. Particularly if the inmate was a minority. Oh, and let’s not forget the brutality of actual innocent black folks going about their day by cops too. That type of injustice happens right here all the time. Now that the shoe is on the other foot, it hurt, don’t it?

So no, GOP. How about you…

several seats


Hard Lessons Learned


August of 1997, I moved into my dorm at Southern Illinois University. That first weekend, I participated in all the freshman activities and bonded with the other students on my floor. Little did I know, that same weekend a boy that I had a huge crush on and dated one summer, died in a car accident. My mother called and told me the following weekend. I couldn’t believe it. Death at that age just seemed so unreal to me.

Stunned, I walked over to my suitemate’s room and told her and another guy about this tragedy. Do you know what she said? Let me tell you. She looked at me with cold soulless eyes and said, “Well, I guess you can’t f*ck him now, can you?”


The guy and I looked at each other in absolute shock. He kinda gave her the side-eye and then asked me if I was okay. Being the sweet, unconfrontational person that I was, I brushed it off and hoped that she’d just had a small stroke, which caused a glitch in her brain that would make her lash out and say something so cruel.


I really wish I knew about this sage advice back then, because that female, to-date, is one of the evilest people that I have ever met in my entire life. And honestly, almost every time I’ve met someone this Maya Angelou quote remains true.

Which brings me to the reason for this blog post.

I’ve heard this phrase since January 20th, by tons of people about our new Manchild-in-Chief, who shall not be named… “Just give him a chance.”

Uh… Why?

He showed us exactly who he was from Day 1 of announcing his plans to run for president. Even before that. Are y’all deaf? Are you blind? Did you get amnesia? Did you just wake up from a coma? Are you Rip Van Winkle and just woke up after a long ass nap?

Were you not there when stories about him stiffing working class people out of payment, who had worked for him? Did you really think his main concern would be you, the little guy after you heard that? Were you not there when it came out that his university scammed thousands of people out of money while fattening his pockets? Did you not think that since he has money deep in the Dakota Pipeline that he wouldn’t find a way to bypass the halt on it through sacred Native lands? Did you not know that his clothing line was made in China as well as that hideous red hat talking about ‘Make America Great Again’? Did you really think he’d suddenly have a change of heart and run out and get you jobs? When he talked about grabbing women’s pussies, walked through the dressing room of pageant contestants (underage as well) while they were undressed and rude enough not to show his own wife the simplest of courtesies, did that not give you at least a tiny indication of what he thinks about women? Now he’s signing papers, surrounded by equally douchy men, to get all up in our business and vaginas.

When he said he’d repeal the ACA, what did you think he was talking about? Oh, never mind, you thought the ACA and Obamacare were two separate things.

Did you not see his childish tweets about the media, hear him praise Putin, or cry orange tears when anyone criticized him? So how is it surprising that he’d try to silence the media or anyone else who may criticize him? Or when it looks as if Russia really was tampering with the election? Or that the very first press conference held under his administration was about the media pointing out (accurately) the ‘yuge’ difference in Obama’s inauguration and Orange Foolius’ inauguration, instead of something important.

And all that is just a fraction of the sh*tty man he has always been.

At no point, during the campaign or after the election has this Orange Beast shown that he is a decent human being. He’s shown that he is unwell. And that hasn’t changed one ounce since he rode down that elevator a year and a half ago.

Those of us with our very rights at stake saw it immediately. The only people who are telling the rest of us to give him a chance, seem to be people who are living a charmed and/or privileged life. Or in denial and don’t want to admit that the man they voted for was a catastrophic mistake. Trying to remain in this dream world of sugar plums and gum drops.

But y’all gonna learn soon. Just like I did in 1997 as a kid at college.

Too bad your foolhardy views and complacency as ADULTS will probably destroy lives and quite possibly our country or even the world.

Just remember… You were warned.

Happy New Year?

Hey, folks! Long time no see. I’m sorry I’ve been away and inconsistent for a while. I’ve been too flabbergasted with the changes this country is going through to even come up with anything truly coherent to write about.

Relationships? Meh.

Body image? Who cares?!

Trumpelthinskin? Don’t even get me started.

Anything I’d write would sound more like the ravings of a lunatic. Incoherent, spit-filled rants.

So instead, I’ve been trying to get my ducks in a row just in case this country goes to hell in a handbasket. I’m not above running to another country. Especially, considering I’ve wanted to move for years anyway. The election results just put a fire under my ass to get going.

Anyway, I have some trips planned this year and I pray that they revive my creativity. Hopefully, I’ll be able to write a fun travel segment.

Stay tuned…

Stay hopeful.

Go Back to Where You Came From…


I just finished watching Nightly News with Lester Holt, Olympic edition. One of the stories was about Saber champion (aka fencing) Ibtihaj Muhammad. She’s an African American Muslim that grew up in New Jersey. She talked about her sport and she also talked about her struggles as a Muslim woman in America. She said that people have told her to ‘Go back to where you came from.’ Where? Jersey? Because, newsflash entitled A-holes, she’s just as American as you are.

immigrants 2Why is it that the main people always shouting ‘Go back to where you came from’ are racist Euro-Americans (aka white)? The only group of people allowed to actually say those words are Native Americans and Mexicans, considering both were the original peoples of this land. Yeah, that’s right. California, Nevada, Arizona, Texas, New Mexico, Utah and more were originally part of Mexico. So go take several seats with your illegal immigration bullsh*t. Europeans were the first illegal immigrants.

And seeing as how your ancestors brought black folks over here against our will, we belong here more than you do too.

So here’s a suggestion. Whenever you’re feeling the phrase ‘Go back to where you came from’ bubble up to the surface, ready to spew out like vomit, swallow it down and say it to yourself if you don’t like where America is heading. Because in my eyes, America is looking mighty beautiful with all of the colorful people with their rich cultures and different religious beliefs (Just an FYI…almost all religions stem from one and have many of the same values. There are murdering rat bastards in every religion. Christians, being some of the worst in history).

In fact, the only ugly and unfortunate thing about America right now is…YOU. Yeah, you. That person that’s holding on to an old America where only Euro-Americans had rights, the opportunity to be successful, and ran off or corralled anyone that didn’t resemble them.

So Europe is waiting, my friends. Bye! And don’t let the door hit you in the ass on the way out.

Wait…Crap! I want to visit and possibly move to Europe. No, you can’t go there. How about Russia. Russia looks lovely. Such picturesque winters and a charming president to boot. Yeah, Russia. Russia sounds perfect.

P.S. Before anyone gets butt hurt, I clearly said racist Euro-Americans. If you’re not a racist douche, this article is not about you. You’re cool. You can stay.

***I do not own the rights to this photos.***

The Storm In A Black Woman’s Mind



The Storm In A BLack Woman’s Mind I wish I knew the artist who did this! But I do not claim this as my own.


I’ve seen this artwork circulating around social media off and on for a while now. Every time I see it, it speaks to my soul. But no time, as much as right now. The recent events in this country and the world has me sad, depressed, and lacking motivation in all areas of my life. My fitness goals, which I’m proud to say that since the first week of January, I haven’t missed a full week of working out. But now, I’m lacking the motivation to go every day. My writing has also taken a hard hit and I’m finding it nearly impossible to immerse myself in the fictional world I was creating. I tried not to let it, but 2016 has been a beast and we’re only halfway through the year and it has officially burst my nicely insulated bubble.

As anyone knows or has gathered from my previous blogs, I’ve always felt like I was on the outside of the black community. My writing though has opened up a world of amazing black women that I can finally relate to, as well as causing me to spend a lot of time on social media in recent years, talking about and promoting my books. Which opened up the world I was trying to hide from. The ugly parts.

You see, purposely (and forced sometimes) staying in my bubble with my white and Latino friends, gave me a false sense of security. Where I could pretend that the level racism and racial bias that infects the world, weren’t that bad.

But with every killing of innocent and unarmed black men and women, being brought to light with videos from camera phones and the speed in which to upload them.

Every article about relationships and how black women aren’t wanted for whatever reason, by white and black men alike.

Every video or ad of some fashion magazine appropriating black and brown culture, renaming it and calling it trendy after telling black and brown people they looked ghetto, unkempt, and/or unprofessional with the exact same style.

Every time a black man turns up his nose at my natural hair. Brainwashed into thinking a black woman’s hair in its natural state isn’t beautiful. A natural state that grows out of his own head, by the way. 

Every troll that makes racist comments about a model’s big beautiful lips, while non-black women are praised for having “black features”, see Kylie Jenner for the lips and Kim Kardashian for the ass, just to name a few. Or they harass a wonderfully funny and beautiful black comedian. Or they attack the President’s daughter because she was accepted to Harvard, not unlike many 1st children that have been accepted to Ivy League schools.

Every Trump supporter that screamed, spit, and punched at black, brown, or Muslim protesters.

BLMEvery person dismissing our cries and woes by telling us to shut up with “All Lives Matter,” when it’s apparent they could give a sh*t about black lives, so, in fact, we don’t matter, which then turns into a vicious argument that circles round and round.

Every movie that comes out about the Kings and Queens of Egypt (a country in AFRICA) they depict them as tan white people or any other whitewashing done by Hollywood to other ethnic cultures. Yet, in turn, the minute someone wants to put a black man as James Bond or make Iron Man a little black girl, fictional characters I might add, people get butt hurt. FYI: sorry to burst your bubble, but Jesus was BLACK (hair of wool and skin of bronze and all that)!!! A real person who is always depicted as a white man. That goes for Moses, The Lone Ranger (Yes, the Lone Ranger was based off a real black man named Bass Reeves), Cleopatra…

Every blog post, I read about the publishing industry not being diverse enough, only for them to ask white authors to write about diverse characters, instead of actual people of color (ME!), only to get it so wrong that it’s offensive.

Every time only one… ONE of the thousands of literary agents is “woke” enough to see that there are little to no representation for children of color in YA novels and has to call out to authors of color for their stories because no one else will (I submitted my YA novel to her and she was, of course, inundated with queries because there are so many talented authors of color with stories to tell, for children who are thirsty to read them).

Every time we’re just trying to have fun, like everyone else, but literally get kicked to the curb because we’re not supposed to have that much fun.

Every famous black person who advocates for fairness and equality in this country (which is not unreasonable to ask for) who then gets called racist and a petition is made for him to get fired from his job. Essentially telling us we don’t have freedom of speech either.

Every black man who decides to fight violence with violence (which is actually very few) and everyone automatically assumes we all want to kill cops because we couldn’t possibly have our own minds. And then the day after the Dallas attack on cops, a cop trails behind me and then rides slowly along beside me, basically saying “Give me a reason.”

Every time my dad and mom leave the house and I have to not think about what may happen to them, or trying not to worry about my brother in Chicago or my nephew that is dark-skinned, tall, and muscular. By the way, none of us have any criminal records or are violent in any way, but that won’t matter to the wrong cop if we move too fast or not kiss enough ass.

Every article, I read about cities in Europe where black skin is welcomed (there shouldn’t have to be articles like that) and then one of those cities I was thinking about visiting gets attacked during a festival (can’t win for losing).

Every time a black athlete’s career is essentially ruined and endorsements lost because of mistakes in his private life(see, Tiger Woods). But Maria Sharapova gets banned from tennis tournaments for the next couple of years because of performance enhancing drugs in her system and then she gets into some Harvard business program.

Every time a black woman is viewed as so strong that her needs are neglected or she’s looked down upon because she needs help. But a white woman stubs her big toe and a battalion is sent to tend to her (See, Taylor Swift). Or when a black woman falters or is fighting depression, her mental health is ignored by her own community as well as others. Because “we don’t get depressed, we just need Jesus.”

With every single one of these, and keep in mind that I’m probably missing a ton, my bubble has burst. In fact, it burst so violently, it was like a tornado ripped my house right off of its foundation. And now I’m standing in the middle of this sh*t-storm brewing around me and in my head with no signs of letting up because these things keep happening over and over again, throughout history for centuries with no end in sight.

Does it make sense now? Does all of that finally outline some of the turmoil a black woman faces? And believe me, I’m just scratching the surface. Education, housing, employment, health care, etcetera, etcetera, etcetera…

Yet, we’re constantly called angry. Did it ever occur to you that we have every reason to be? Here’s a pair of my shoes… Try walking in them for a few days, let alone 37 years. I bet you’ll be angry AF. And my suburban upbringing isn’t even close to what people of color in urban areas have to deal with. Wear their shoes and your head would explode.

***Post may be amended as other issues come to mind.***

Stop Drinking the Kool-Aid!!!

In another installment of Insightful Saturdays…

koolaidSo, with Donald Trump in the lead for the GOP candidate, more people endorsing him every day, and the awfulness of this country in general, I thought to myself “There has to be better than this!” I thought “We can’t be the only free country, right?”

Now, I don’t pretend to know a whole hell of a lot about politics and world economics or anything close to it. I don’t like politics and I don’t know enough about it to make educated arguments against one or the other political parties. But I do know how I feel and I do get a sense of when things just aren’t right. And there’s a whole lot of wrong going on in this country. Especially, speaking as a Black woman in this country. When you’re low man on the totem pole, the world looks a lot differently down here as opposed to being the king of the world up top.

I’ve always wanted to travel around the globe. I’ve already lived in Japan, visited Vietnam and Taipei, Taiwan. Though now, my main goal is to get to Europe and visit the countries there. But when I say travel, I’m talking about a very unconventional way of traveling. I’m talking about living in the places I want to visit for 3-4 months at a time and then move on to the next place. I’m a writer, so doing this could be possible as long as my books generate enough income for me to do it, which is not the case as of yet. One can hope and dream.

Anyway, the reason for my need to travel this way is because I’m looking for my “forever home”. And you cannot get a feel for a place as a forever home by just going on a week long trip there. You have to be there for months and spend time with the locals to get a feel for everyday life. For instance, Japan. Japan is a lovely country with wonderful traditions and amazingly sweet people. But it is not somewhere I want to live for the rest of my life and I would have never known that, had I not lived there for a year.

But before you make plans to move or visit anywhere, you kinda want to know what you’re dealing with. So we constantly hear in the U.S. that we’re the best. We’re the land of the free and the home of the brave. People always make it sound like we’re the best country in the world, which is why we’re always trying to keep immigrants out. Well…STOP DRINKING THE DAMN KOOL-AID!!! We are not the best nor the freest. Maybe we gave other countries the idea (I’m not really sure, since I’m not a history buff either. I think it actually might have been the Greeks that came up with democracy, but whatever), but in the years we’ve been pounding our chests and proclaiming that we’re the best, other countries have actually been steadily climbing up and surpassed us. And without the majority of us even paying attention to how it even happened. Just take a look at this article from August of 2015: We’re ranked number freaking 20 on the list!!! WTF!

Just look at this map:

Free World 1

Country ratings from Freedom House’s Freedom in the World 2015 survey, concerning the state of world freedom in 2014.   Free-In Green (89)   Partly Free-In Yellow (55)   Not Free-In Purple (51)

Eighty-nine countries are free!!! Well, according to this map from Wikipedia (So it might not be completely factual, but based on the articles I’ve read, it’s pretty damn close).

Or how about this map:

Free World 2

In Blue- Countries designated “electoral democracies” in Freedom House’s 2016 survey “Freedom in the World”, covering the year 2015.

In blue are all the countries you can vote in! Say what?!?

Please, don’t get me wrong. I love my country. But I think of it kinda like living in my parents’ house or my hometown. You raised me, you taught me well and gave me my values. But I’m older now. I’ve grown up and seen behind the curtain. I can see that I don’t agree with everything you believe in and I have my own opinions about the world now. So I thank you for making me into the person I am today, but it is time for me to see what else the world has to offer me. It’s time to leave the nest, but don’t worry, I’ll be back to visit.

So, I don’t know about you guys, but you can keep on drinking the Kool-aid they’ve been force-feeding us. I, myself, plan on getting the hell outta dodge the minute I can afford it. There has to be something better out there. And if not, maybe I’ll learn to appreciate my country more through my travels. At this stage, though…I doubt it.