No! White Privilege Will Not Start A War!

That’s not how this works. That’s not how any of this works!

“Otto’s fate deepens my Administration’s determination to prevent such tragedies from befalling innocent people at the hands of regimes that do not respect the rule of law or basic human decency,” he added.” -Donald Trump via New York Post

My heart goes out to Otto Warmbier and his family. And it is unfortunate what happened to him and unfair considering the minor crime he committed. But this has to be said… ‘Befalling innocent people?!’ No sir, he was not innocent. His whiteness does not make him innocent. He went to a country he had no business going to. And he stole while he was there. That does not denote innocence.

It was North Korea, for god’s sake! Not the United States of White Privilege. You don’t go to a country like that and even take a piss wrong. Especially if you’re a foreigner from a rival country.

Warmbier is a sad, but prime example of white privilege that does not extend to non-white countries. Dear White people, when you go to Asian, African (predominately black), and/or South American countries, you will not get the same benefits that you get here in the States or European countries. Just like the kid in Singapore back in the 90s who was caned for vandalism.

Let this sink in…Your whiteness will not protect you there like it does here.

Yet, I heard that some in the GOP were calling for action against North Korea. Oh hell no!!! We should not have to go to war because some kid forgot he wasn’t in America and committed a crime. He should not have lost his life, but this is why you don’t commit crimes in countries you know nothing about. But I’ll tell you this, most people know (especially those with enough money to travel abroad) not to go to a country like N.Korea and fuck around like you’re in small town USA and get a pat on the back and a verbal warning by the local sheriff (if you’re white). And guess what? There have been plenty of inmates right here in ‘Murica that have died at the hands of guards and not a single thing happened to the guards. Particularly if the inmate was a minority. Oh, and let’s not forget the brutality of actual innocent black folks going about their day by cops too. That type of injustice happens right here all the time. Now that the shoe is on the other foot, it hurt, don’t it?

So no, GOP. How about you…

several seats

Hard Lessons Learned

Storytime!

August of 1997, I moved into my dorm at Southern Illinois University. That first weekend, I participated in all the freshman activities and bonded with the other students on my floor. Little did I know, that same weekend a boy that I had a huge crush on and dated one summer, died in a car accident. My mother called and told me the following weekend. I couldn’t believe it. Death at that age just seemed so unreal to me.

Stunned, I walked over to my suitemate’s room and told her and another guy about this tragedy. Do you know what she said? Let me tell you. She looked at me with cold soulless eyes and said, “Well, I guess you can’t f*ck him now, can you?”

Silence.

The guy and I looked at each other in absolute shock. He kinda gave her the side-eye and then asked me if I was okay. Being the sweet, unconfrontational person that I was, I brushed it off and hoped that she’d just had a small stroke, which caused a glitch in her brain that would make her lash out and say something so cruel.

maya-quote

I really wish I knew about this sage advice back then, because that female, to-date, is one of the evilest people that I have ever met in my entire life. And honestly, almost every time I’ve met someone this Maya Angelou quote remains true.

Which brings me to the reason for this blog post.

I’ve heard this phrase since January 20th, by tons of people about our new Manchild-in-Chief, who shall not be named… “Just give him a chance.”

Uh… Why?

He showed us exactly who he was from Day 1 of announcing his plans to run for president. Even before that. Are y’all deaf? Are you blind? Did you get amnesia? Did you just wake up from a coma? Are you Rip Van Winkle and just woke up after a long ass nap?

Were you not there when stories about him stiffing working class people out of payment, who had worked for him? Did you really think his main concern would be you, the little guy after you heard that? Were you not there when it came out that his university scammed thousands of people out of money while fattening his pockets? Did you not think that since he has money deep in the Dakota Pipeline that he wouldn’t find a way to bypass the halt on it through sacred Native lands? Did you not know that his clothing line was made in China as well as that hideous red hat talking about ‘Make America Great Again’? Did you really think he’d suddenly have a change of heart and run out and get you jobs? When he talked about grabbing women’s pussies, walked through the dressing room of pageant contestants (underage as well) while they were undressed and rude enough not to show his own wife the simplest of courtesies, did that not give you at least a tiny indication of what he thinks about women? Now he’s signing papers, surrounded by equally douchy men, to get all up in our business and vaginas.

When he said he’d repeal the ACA, what did you think he was talking about? Oh, never mind, you thought the ACA and Obamacare were two separate things.

Did you not see his childish tweets about the media, hear him praise Putin, or cry orange tears when anyone criticized him? So how is it surprising that he’d try to silence the media or anyone else who may criticize him? Or when it looks as if Russia really was tampering with the election? Or that the very first press conference held under his administration was about the media pointing out (accurately) the ‘yuge’ difference in Obama’s inauguration and Orange Foolius’ inauguration, instead of something important.

And all that is just a fraction of the sh*tty man he has always been.

At no point, during the campaign or after the election has this Orange Beast shown that he is a decent human being. He’s shown that he is unwell. And that hasn’t changed one ounce since he rode down that elevator a year and a half ago.

Those of us with our very rights at stake saw it immediately. The only people who are telling the rest of us to give him a chance, seem to be people who are living a charmed and/or privileged life. Or in denial and don’t want to admit that the man they voted for was a catastrophic mistake. Trying to remain in this dream world of sugar plums and gum drops.

But y’all gonna learn soon. Just like I did in 1997 as a kid at college.

Too bad your foolhardy views and complacency as ADULTS will probably destroy lives and quite possibly our country or even the world.

Just remember… You were warned.

Seeking a Friend for the End of the World…

 

couples-holding-hands

I haven’t published a blog post in quite some time because I honestly couldn’t form the words to explain how I have been feeling. Though there have been plenty of blogs and articles I’ve read recently where the writer articulated my feeling perfectly. So I’ll let them handle all that. I, on the other hand, wanted to rant and rave and scream and cry. I did a little bit of everything, except scream. But I was close.

Anyway, in the past three years, the last thing I’ve been too concerned with is finding a man. For the most part, I’ve been entirely too wrapped up in trying to further my writing career to worry about getting into a relationship. But lately, I’ve been feeling the loneliness and slight desperation of being single. I couldn’t really figure out why. And then it hit me.

I’ve been seeking a friend for the end of the world.

Never is it more imperative to be surrounded by love than when tragedy strikes or hard times are imminent. So as I watch Hitler the second coming, build his regime against all people that look like me and other minority groups, I swallow with real fear and look around for anyone to hold my hand…

There is no one.

Don’t get me wrong. I have my parents. But it’s just not the same. My dad needs to focus on protecting my mom and vice versa. They don’t need to be worried about me too. I need my own set of strong and sure arms to seek comfort in and to give comfort back. And I ain’t got it. That’s right. I used ain’t. It fits my mood and the current situation.

We are smack dab in the middle of cuffing season (the chilly time of year where people decide to couple up). But this time, we have more reason than ever to cuff ourselves to someone and for the long haul. All of our futures are unsure at the moment. We have no idea what’s to come. A second Civil War, WWIII, the start of the Hunger Games, nuclear winter, an even worse Great Depression or all of the above. So I say if you can find a pretty damn good person to cuff yourself to. Do it. Do it now!

As for myself… I’m taking applications.

end-of-the-world

 *Side note: I’ll even take a fellow single woman if nothing more than to team up for the apocalypse. Girl Scout training preferable. I’ve watched a lot of Bear Grylls, myself. I’m also pretty smart and resourceful.

Word-of-Mouth Dies on the Lips of White Readers

I’ve been a self-published author for nearly three years. I’ve published 12 works and can now kind of gauge what’s happening with my books and readers by my sales. The majority of my readers are Black women since I write Interracial Erotic Romance with a main focus on Black Woman/White Man characters. Though my books rarely ever even address race. They’re just love stories like any other. Anyway, I digress.

When a book is first released, especially books that were available for pre-order, sales start out relatively high. After a while, depending on how well you promoted and how many readers are spreading the word, sales can peter off. Then let’s say, a few months later, I see Book 1 of one of my series sells on Monday, then on Tuesday or before Monday is even over, Book 2 is purchased and shortly after that Book 3. I can tell that it was more than likely one person that was really into my series and snatched up all the books. Then within a couple days of that random purchase, I’ll see sales for Book 1 shoot up when it had flat-lined for quite some time. It is relatively obvious then that the original reader told her friends, family and co-workers about the series and they want to experience the story too. In the nutshell, word-of-mouth.

Word-of-mouth is huge for an author. You can advertise, promote, and hustle all day and it will help. But word-of-mouth is what books live and die by. I’ve heard that Fifty Shades of Grey rose to the top because of book clubs that shouted praise at the top of their lungs. And I have no doubt that many, if not all of those book clubs were predominantly white. So it’s obvious that white word-of-mouth is a powerful tool when it comes to going mainstream. As a black author, I wish it wasn’t so. Because in my experience, when it comes to a book being lead by a black female protagonist, white readers clam up tighter than a virgin inside a bank vault.

Prime example:

Chasing Day Cover

Chasing Day (Book 1): He’s the golden boy quarterback of the football team. She the shy, plump orchestra geek. Unlikely best friends. An undeniable attraction… Tap here to purchase.

I’ve been involved with a cross-promotional group of authors on Facebook for nearly a year now. It’s a mix of Romance authors, but mainly white. We blast our readers every quarter with freebies in an opportunity to expand our readership to readers that may have never found us, to begin with. For some of the black authors in the group, that means possibly finding white readers that normally wouldn’t go out of their way to look for us. In the most recent freebie blast, I gave away Chasing Day, Book 1 in a two-part series. That day, I got over 5,000 downloads. The potential for read-through to Book 2 and crossing over to new readers is definitely higher with those results. And every time we do a blast for some odd-marketing-universe-reason sales for that book shoot up even after it’s no longer free.

 

It wasn’t long before I saw definite read-through to Book 2. In fact, sales for Book 2 did remarkably well for a while, considering my still relatively newbie standards. So it’s obvious that those who have read Chasing Day so far, are liking it enough to buy the sequel. There were about 40-50 books for free in the promotion, so I don’t expect all of those 5,000+ readers to get to my book right away.

 

But also, what I noticed is that, though sales for Book 2 went up, sales for Book 1 flat-lined. Which it is glaringly obvious what’s happening, or shall I say, not happening. They are loving the story enough to continue on to the sequel. But they’re not comfortable enough to tell their friends, family, and co-workers about it. I am a reader before I am a writer. When I’ve come across a book I adore, I let it be known to anyone who will listen. And I know that is what almost all readers do. Because once you find your tribe, you have to share in the joys and heartbreak of a story. You can’t be alone in your adoration of a book. Even now, if I read a book that its characters are White Woman/White Man (i.e Archer’s Voice and Me Before You), if I love it enough, I will still tell my friends and readers about them. Even knowing that many of them prefer to read black heroines. A good book is a good book, no matter the race of the author or characters.

And I know what you’re probably thinking, “Maybe your book isn’t as good as you think it is and that’s why they aren’t sharing it.” I’ll admit, I love my series and may be biased but I seriously doubt that it’s the best series ever written. I’d have to be delusional and quite egotistical to believe that. But it’s still a good story that I poured my heart into. And a few of the white readers that were kind enough to leave a review, did in fact, sing its praises. So I’m not completely off-base in my summation here.

So I say to anyone who is reading this, I urge you, for the sake of art, if you come across a good book that you thoroughly enjoyed but it’s not something you or your friends would normally read…share it anyway. If you liked it, they probably will too. Your recommendation is our life’s blood. Our books live and die by your word-of-mouth. So for the love of God, speak up!

***Anyone interested in signing up for my newsletter to get these awesome deals and freebies I mentioned above, click here. Also, you get a free eBook when you sign up for my newsletter.***

Conservatives Confuse the Hell Outta Me

I’m a pretty laidback person and obviously a liberal. But I’m also a person that can see both sides of many arguments. Sometimes, it’s hard for me to even take a side on certain issues or subjects because I can see the pros and cons of both views. But for the life of me, I can’t figure out the logic of many conservatives. Here’s an example:

So you’re anti-sex education in schools which often leads to teen pregnancy (just look at Mississippi as an example of how terrible that idea is). The teen wants to get an abortion, but you’ve banned it because you’re anti-abortion. Now she has two choices. Keep the baby or give it up for adoption. She keeps the baby, but she can’t afford to take care of it, and she can’t get welfare because you’re against that too. Or she decides to give the baby up for adoption and a really great gay or lesbian couple with good jobs and kind hearts are the only people who want to adopt the baby, but they can’t because you’re against LGBTQ people adopting children who need families.

So what, exactly are people supposed to do?

What in God’s name do you want?

I know. You want kids to abstain from sex without any working knowledge of sex. FYI…that doesn’t work (again, Mississippi). You want control over a woman’s body. But if you have control over my uterus, I get control of your balls. Don’t like that idea, do ya? You want welfare recipients to get a job, yet you and your homies have sent off most of the good jobs to other countries, just so you can have a fourth house and bigger yacht. And you want LGBTQ people to just disappear back into their closets. Well, that ain’t gonna happen either. They’d rather face discrimination coming out proudly than living a lie to seek your approval.

So I’m gonna need you guys to make up your minds because you can’t have it both ways. You refuse to grow and evolve. Which is why your party is on the brink of extinction. Survival of the fittest and all.

Go Back to Where You Came From…

immigrants

I just finished watching Nightly News with Lester Holt, Olympic edition. One of the stories was about Saber champion (aka fencing) Ibtihaj Muhammad. She’s an African American Muslim that grew up in New Jersey. She talked about her sport and she also talked about her struggles as a Muslim woman in America. She said that people have told her to ‘Go back to where you came from.’ Where? Jersey? Because, newsflash entitled A-holes, she’s just as American as you are.

immigrants 2Why is it that the main people always shouting ‘Go back to where you came from’ are racist Euro-Americans (aka white)? The only group of people allowed to actually say those words are Native Americans and Mexicans, considering both were the original peoples of this land. Yeah, that’s right. California, Nevada, Arizona, Texas, New Mexico, Utah and more were originally part of Mexico. So go take several seats with your illegal immigration bullsh*t. Europeans were the first illegal immigrants.

And seeing as how your ancestors brought black folks over here against our will, we belong here more than you do too.

So here’s a suggestion. Whenever you’re feeling the phrase ‘Go back to where you came from’ bubble up to the surface, ready to spew out like vomit, swallow it down and say it to yourself if you don’t like where America is heading. Because in my eyes, America is looking mighty beautiful with all of the colorful people with their rich cultures and different religious beliefs (Just an FYI…almost all religions stem from one and have many of the same values. There are murdering rat bastards in every religion. Christians, being some of the worst in history).

In fact, the only ugly and unfortunate thing about America right now is…YOU. Yeah, you. That person that’s holding on to an old America where only Euro-Americans had rights, the opportunity to be successful, and ran off or corralled anyone that didn’t resemble them.

So Europe is waiting, my friends. Bye! And don’t let the door hit you in the ass on the way out.

Wait…Crap! I want to visit and possibly move to Europe. No, you can’t go there. How about Russia. Russia looks lovely. Such picturesque winters and a charming president to boot. Yeah, Russia. Russia sounds perfect.

P.S. Before anyone gets butt hurt, I clearly said racist Euro-Americans. If you’re not a racist douche, this article is not about you. You’re cool. You can stay.

***I do not own the rights to this photos.***

Schools vs Natural Black Hair

Stop banning natural black hairstyles!

Every few months I read another headline or see another video about a school banning natural black hairstyles. I can’t tell you how irritating this is to me and most of the black population. So I’m writing this blog as a reference for any school board who makes up these discriminatory rules, to check when in doubt.

Let’s start by going over what it takes to straightened black hair, so that you understand why many are opting to go natural. We either need to hot-comb, flat-iron, or chemically relax our hair. Absolutely none of these methods are healthy for ANYONE’S hair. Especially, for a prolonged amount of time.

Case in point…

Our hair can either be chemically burned from our scalps or our hair can thin out permanently. I, myself, have a permanent bald spot on the back of my head, due to a relaxer. Which is why many black women have made the decision to go au naturel and have chosen to keep their daughters’ hair natural as well. This is the crux of the problem. When our hair grows out of our scalps naturally, it grows out, not down like ethnicities with finer hair textures. For whatever reason (I know why, but that’s another post), this is seen as wild, unkempt, unruly, unprofessional, etc. To call what grows naturally out of someone’s hair follicles these nasty things is so wrong on so many levels, I can’t even wrap my head around it. It’s like telling a little brunette girl that her hair color is all wrong and to go bleach it blonde to ‘fit in’ better. You’re basically telling us that how we are naturally is unacceptable. Which is traumatizing to young impressionable kids that are trying to figure out where they fit in this world.

So now, to help the clueless and ignorant, I’m going to take average hairstyles worn by people with finer textured hair and their natural black hair equivalent. Prepare to be schooled…

Messy bob worn down and an Afro:

Ponytail and an AfroPuff:

Pigtails and AfroPuffs:

Bun and Cornrows, basically when parents are too tired to do anything fancy (cornrows can be worn for a week+):

Braid w/ ponytail and Braid w/ Puff:

French braids and Twists:

And let’s not forget about the boys. I’ve heard that a black boy couldn’t go to school because he had a part cut into his hair. Let me take a moment to debunk that nonsense…

Popular undercut style and black boy equivalent:

Shaggy hair cut and dreadlocks:

And there you have it school boards across the country and around the world (that goes for predominantly black schools too). I really hope this helps, because I can’t take another stupid ban on afros, afro puffs, dreadlocks, twists, braids, so on and so forth. Many of these styles are our way of taming and working with what we have naturally in a safe and healthy way. So stop, stop, STOP trying to place us in a box that we don’t fit in. And stop telling our children that their hair isn’t acceptable. They get enough of that garbage when they turn on the TV, get online, or open a magazine. They don’t need it when they go to school and are already trying their best to fit in. You picking them out of the crowd is telling them that they’re ‘other’ and that ‘other’ isn’t good enough. STOP!

***I do not own the rights to these photos.